Everyday, I go over the school lunch menu for the kids’ school to find out what they’d like for lunch the following day.
I let them choose between home lunch and school lunch.
Noah almost always chooses home lunch. When I pack their lunches, I pack a sandwich, string cheese, fruit and a dessert. The dessert is usually a cake of some sort, like a Little Debbie or something from Hostess. This is a big deal to them because I have always done a good job of not really offering many sweets to them. In fact, it’s to the point now where Noah actually chose raisins over chocolate chip cookies at his Grandma’s house the other day. And this is not a rare occurrence.
However, they still enjoy their treats when they get them. Who doesn’t?
Because I was a stay at home Mom, I could consistently make their lunches everyday. Same type of food, same time, every day. They would first eat a sandwich or some other main item with a vegetable and maybe some cheese or a few crackers. Once they were finished with that, I gave them fruit as their dessert.
It worked quite well for us. It has worked out so well that if I don’t give them fruit, they both complain.
So, now that the kids are in school and I’m not there to personally deliver them their lunch, I just trust that they’ll make the right decisions and also eat their lunches.
Noah ALWAYS eats all of his lunch. He is not a rule breaker and even eats his food in the same order. Sandwich. Cheese. Fruit. Dessert. I love his sweet innocence and realize that it will not last forever, but for now, ohmy, it’s the best.
Yesterday, Noah sits down, minding his own business at the lunch table, eats his entire bologna sandwich with butter on whole wheat, eats his string cheese, devours his grapes and carefully opens up his ho-ho. He pulls it out of the package, sets it on the table and the girl next to him smashes it.
He picks it up and throws it away.
He tells me this story and my first instinct is to go kick some kindergarten tail, but I realize, that is not a wise decision. I want to cuddle him and offer him a FEAST of ho-hos, but I don’t, I want to call the school and his teacher and find out WHY this five year old child is TOUCHING my son’s food. But I don’t do that, either.
But I can’t stop thinking about this happening to him. I can’t stop feeling what his heart must have felt like when he watched this happen, he is such a good boy and he would never even think to do something like this and yet, this happens to him.
So, what did I do? I explain to him that what that child did is the exact reason why we want to be nice and loving to everybody. That we never want to make someone feel the way she made him feel.
He agreed. And I hugged him and kissed him and told him I was sorry it happened to him.
And then I told him he had better tell his teacher the very next day.
Not surprisingly, he said “okay.”
October 14th, 2009 at 12:07 pm
I appreciate that you took the high road, so that I can go push this ho ho smashing JERK down the stairs. I find it insulting that she smashed a perfectly good snack cake, first of all, but OF COURSE, I’m especially angry that she did it to Noah who doesn’t even have it in himself to be mean back (which is why I’m perfectly willing to show up at his school and smash her lunch every day–just say the word).
October 14th, 2009 at 1:23 pm
Things like this break my heart! Good for you for being so sweet about it. My Jillian has a personality that sounds just like Noah and last year, a kid in her church class took her headband out of her hand and broke it in several pieces while looking her right in the eye. It was her favorite but she didn’t even want to tell the teacher because she didn’t want anyone to get in trouble. I wanted to beat up his mom to teach him a lesson. Then I found out that the kids the son of my husband’s boss and decided it was probably a good idea to handle it more like you did.
October 14th, 2009 at 4:38 pm
This reminds me of when the twins were in kindergarten and complained that whenever they went to get a drink of water, a big, mean bully pushed them away and got water for himself. I told them that whenever that boy pushed them away, they should wait until he bent over for a drink and then kick him in the butt as hard as they could. They laughed and I did too because we all knew that I’d never condone such behavior.
Anyway, fast forward about 30 years. There was a huge, gentle nurse with my dad when he passed away. He was very shaken by Dad’s passing and didn’t even know that he had known this man’s twin grandsons ever since he was in kindergarten. That’s right. It was the same guy that used to push them away from the water fountain.
It’s a small world after all.
So the high road is the right road for many reasons not the least of which is that you never know when their paths might cross again.
October 14th, 2009 at 4:41 pm
oh poor Noah. I feel so badly for him. I am really hoping that he comes home today and tells you that he was able to eat his ho ho and that the girl said she was sorry.
October 14th, 2009 at 5:27 pm
Oh how sweet he is!I just want to squish HIM. lol
October 14th, 2009 at 6:09 pm
what a meanie. we all had meanie people who did that to us.
arg
October 14th, 2009 at 6:43 pm
Hubby saw the title, and gasped. This is a crime to him I guess.
I think you did the right thing. Sitting here, I wanted to kick some Kindergarten tail too. Mean little girl. Teaching him that some people just need an extra touch of nice is a wonderful thing.
October 14th, 2009 at 7:09 pm
Ugh. Don’t smash ho-ho’s! Thank you for posting this. BB has been getting picked on by a few other boys in preschool. I’ve been trying to explain why we’re still nice and still kind (and still tell a teacher) even if people are mean.
I hope he gets to eat his ho-ho next time.
October 14th, 2009 at 7:10 pm
I love this story. Not because of what happened to Noah, just to know there are other kind-hearted children out there. My son is in Kindergarten too & he has come home with a few stories that have broken my heart as well. We take the same approach with using it as a lesson in always being kind to others, etc. I also love the fact that your first instinct was to kick some butt. That just cracked me up because I’ve experienced all of those same exact thoughts. Thanks for sharing your story, Noah sounds like the kid I would want my kid to be friends with!!!
October 14th, 2009 at 7:31 pm
AWW! Just tell me where to send the BOX of Hostess for Noah!
What a wonderful way to deal with the situation though - you are such a great Mama!
October 14th, 2009 at 9:57 pm
Please, please make sure that Noah’s teacher knows what happened. As a retired kindergarten teacher, I was just so
sad to hear this had happened. I was not in the cafteria when my children ate lunch, so unless someone told me, I never knew when these kind of things happened, and I needed to know so I could comfort children like Noah and talk to the child who did it!
October 14th, 2009 at 11:41 pm
Let me at the little brat. Nobody should be messing with that adorable boy.
October 15th, 2009 at 2:11 am
Oh, that makes me so sad for Noah! He sounds like a real sweet boy, kinda like I think Troy is going to be when he gets older.
You did the right thing.
November 6th, 2009 at 9:22 pm
I am a lunchroom supervisor for a local elementary school.. I HAVE seen it happen and I do correct that when I see it. As many children as there are in my lunchroom at a time it is hard to make sure everyone is (at the same time, mind you) doing what is right. Yesterday I say a child take their spoon and wipe, yes I said wipe, their FACE with the yogurt in the hot lunch choices then proceed to eat it. I separated them and today they ate like a little angel. They did it to get a rise out of the classmates at the table. It is NOT easy to take care of so many of your children at one time, but I wouldn’t have it any other way. I love them all. Yogurt and all. :0)
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