Q: I want to be cremated after my death. However, my wife is against the idea. Should I put the instructions in my will? Is there another way to make sure my wishes are carried out?

A: The simple answer to your question, is yes, you can leave final instructions in your will. In fact, the practice was fairly common many years ago. I haven't seen a will that leaves interment instructions in a while, but I have seen them.

Today, the practice on including such instructions isn't as common. It's not that interment provisions in a will are void, but rather they tend to go unnoticed until it's too late.

When you pass away, it's unlikely that your loved ones will immediately begin looking for the will to see if you left instructions. More likely your kids will bring the will to your attorney a month after you die and say "Huh, look at that. Dad wanted to be cremated." At that point, you will have been buried and the headstone ordered and there's not a lot that can be done. At least nothing that doesn't involved a lot of money, heavy equipment and a court order.

So what can you do? The best suggestion that I can make is to put a preplanned funeral arrangement in place. A preplanned funeral arrangement involves you going to a funeral home and making your arrangements yourself. I know planning your own funeral isn't the most comfortable thing to do, but it makes a lot of sense.

You get to sit down with an expert who can help you make decisions about things you probably have never even thought about. You make the decisions and you have left a thorough set of instructions. If you can swing it financially, I suggest that you pay up front using a funeral trust or a prepaid funeral arrangement. My guess is your loved ones will be more likely to follow your instructions if the money has already exchanged hands. In either case, your wishes are there to be followed or ignored.

If you don't want to or simply can't bring yourself to preplan, I suggest you use a power of attorney. As most of you know, the powers granted under a power of attorney terminate at the death of the principal. However, one of the few powers that survive the death of the principal is the power to make decisions regarding the principal's remains. You might consider granting a power of attorney to someone who you trust to honor your instructions.

Finally, I strongly suggest that you sit down and have discussion with your loved ones. Let them know what your wishes are and your reasoning. An open conversation may accomplish what you want. Your loved ones agreeing to honor your wishes isn't likely to be legally enforceable, but my guess is they will honor your wishes.

If you are uncomfortable with visiting with a funeral director or can't swing it financially, then I would start with the family meeting. Put it out there and see what response you get. If you still aren't comfortable, then think about calling the attorney to put it in the will and to execute a power of attorney.

Opinions expressed solely are those of the writer. Christopher W. Yugo is a member of the Indiana Bar and a vice president and senior trust Officer for First National Bank's Trust Department. Address questions to Yugo in care of The Times, 601 W. 45th Ave., Munster, IN, 46321. Yugo's information is meant to be general in nature. Specific legal, tax, or insurance questions should be referred to your attorney, accountant or estate-planning specialist.