The first year or two in a child's life are of critical importance in psychological value. It is when bonding and attachment occur.

If there is an interruption in that bonding, reactive attachment disorder may happen.

Reactive attachment disorder is when insecure attachments form toward others that can lead to other attachment disorders. These disorders may manifest into social problems, learning problems, mental problems and failed interpersonal relationships. The usual cause of reactive attachment disorder is separation from the primary caregiver for extended times.

At times the parent is emotionally unavailable or rejecting. The child reacts by avoiding closeness. The child may appear very independent, but this is usually a cover for insecurity.

Other times, parents' attention and affection are inconsistent. This ambivalence leads a child to a sense of anxiety and insecurity.

Finally, if a parent shows disorientation or terror, the child becomes disorganized and chaotic.

Despite what some think, reactive attachment disorder is not based on a socioeconomic status. Children who have had a succession of nannies, children placed in foster homes, mothers (or fathers) who abandoned the home, or parents who have been seriously ill or have maternal depression all put the child at risk.

Some symptoms of insecure attachment are extreme neediness from the child, clingy behavior toward strangers, inability to deal with stress, hoarding food, lack of empathy or remorse, or learning difficulties.

These children are neurologically disrupted and cannot go through normal developmental processes. Some of these children are incorrectly diagnosed and may receive unnecessary psychotropic medication.

So, how is inadequate attachment repaired? It takes many months, even years for speech and thought to develop. One way is a visual process, maintaining eye contact and noting facial expression. Another is auditory, tone of voice and intensity. However, every child is different, and what works for one child make not work for another. Children vary in what they find soothing.

Therefore, parents must explore the best techniques for soothing their child to make a connection. It is important to share positive emotional experiences as well as negative emotional experiences. A child intuitively knows when there are negative feelings, and thus, feels a need to be a part of them. This includes, at times, saying "no" to them.

Reactive attachment disorder is a very complicated condition. Left untreated, it will follow the child into adulthood. There are many therapies for attachment disorders. If you feel your child is suffering from this, contact a therapist so treatment can begin and the child has a normal emotional experience through the years.

The opinions expressed are solely those of the writer. Christine Priesol is a licensed clinical social worker. She maintains a private practice in Munster. She can be reached at cpriesol@aol.com. Due to volume, she is unable to answer each letter individually.